To each their own.

Agnostic: a person who holds that the existence of the ultimate cause, as God, and the essential nature of things are unknown and unknowable, or that human knowledge is limited to experience.

Atheist: a person who denies or disbelieves the existence of a supreme being or beings.

Recently my mother emailed me to “trust God, for (S)he is paving the way.” As an Agnostic, I am always a little confused with how to view faith. First off, before you go “But you are Agnostic! You don’t have faith!” I will stop you right there. I am not an Atheist. I believe that there is possibly something out there; however, I do not feel that human intelligence can truly comprehend what it is.

In all honesty, faith does feel like a nice fall back, like a way of reassuring myself that it will be alright, because at least it’s being paved intentionally. It is easier to not constantly question what God might be. It is more reassuring to say “There is a God. He is spoken of in the Bible.” and be done with any questions or debate or doubts. But to me, that feels too limiting a definition. To me, God cannot be truly understood by humankind. The human language does not have the depth and breadth of understanding to put it into words. To me, there is no true definition.

I constantly wonder: Is there a Greater Good or a God or a Higher Being that puts things in motion? Are things meant to be? Do we will things through our thoughts or how we put forth our energy? Paving our own paths through thought that is repeated again and again? Or is it solely through action that we get the things we desire, need, and want?

Is it God, Buddha, or Allah? Is it all of those gods or prophets or wise men all rolled into One or none of them? Is it the Law of Attraction or are we here alone?  And why are there so many versions of God? Has God been lost in translation? Man creates their concepts: Jesus and God; the Holy Trinity; Buddha; the Deities of Hinduism; the Islamic faith and Muslims; Allah; Judaism; Mother Earth; Wiccans;  Pagans; even Satanists have staked their claim in Religion and their place on this “list.” We have so many different holy texts! If there are so many, does that not prove that none are actually the One True Religion? Or is it like countries with their different cultures and languages? To each their own belief. It might all just be the same thing in the end.

Having been baptized and brought up Russian Orthodox with nine years spent attending Catholic school, the concept of God is very familiar to me. Perhaps that is why faith is part of my spiritual vocabulary. I do not feel that when I speak of faith that I am necessarily speaking about God. Maybe I am looking inward and my faith is found within myself, as well as the world around me. If asked to describe this Higher Being, I would have to say I feel that it is an omnipresent light that reaches every corner of the World, this Universe, this Galaxy, and everything else beyond. Everywhere. Places we know and places we will never see nor experience. Places only found in dreams and Science Fiction or Fantasy Novels and Movies. The Known and Unknown.



Definitions: Atheist: and Agnostic: